(500) Movies of Summer

it’s glorious summer time, and that means I am overcome with the desire to sit in movie theaters. maybes it’s the stink of the garbage strike, or just the promise of 2 hours of stress-free entertainment, but i just want to see everything that comes out. (note: my “everything” doesn’t include G-Force.) From best to worst, what I’ve seen so far…

(500) Days of Summer
If I had to use one word only to describe this one, it would be charming. The soundtrack is genius; it’s a movie clearly made by someone who loves movies (the French film spoof was tres funny); and Zooey Deschanel is just the dreamiest. I got the issue of Self with her on the cover (and let’s be honest, the cover shot is not traditional; she looks kind of like a normal human being, in awesome clothes). Read her story on 31 things to do during summer; her soup recipe ends with “Serve in bowls. (This is important; soup should not be served on a plate!)” How’s that for a movie review? A soup joke.

The Proposal I know, right? But seriously this is the perfect romantic comedy. It is exactly what you expect, with the right amount of chemistry, right number of obstacles, and right background color and characters (Alaska, book publishing, Betty White). I did not want it to end.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince People seem to like this movie? I didn’t really. Because it’s more of a stepping stone (through a dark lake in a cave) to the 7th and final installment of the story, there’s no real epic battle scene, and those are my favorite parts of Harry Potters. The love story between Ron and Hermione successfully stayed away from being nagging & annoying, as it was in the book. But overall, I rate this film a “meh.” (Sorry!) And the one thing that I know was intentional and artistic, but drove me crazy, was the decision to keep the focus clear on characters’ faces in close-up but fuzz out the rest of them. Draco’s shoulder: fuzzy; his face: clear. Or in long shots, the characters would be out of focus, having some epic conversation with the actors likely trying very hard to emote, but you couldn’t see their expressions. All you could see in focus was some architectural detail of Hogwarts. A beautiful building, but…

My Sister’s Keeper Why? Why did I see this movie? My advice is if you do see this movie, try to start crying right away. Otherwise, like me, you will feel like you’ve held it together pretty well, only to break down into uncontrollable sobs β€” literally uncontrollable β€” and have to think hard about silly things Cameron Diaz has done in other movies to calm down. And one should never have to think of her in that Mary movie ever hever again.

Land of the Lost Coulda been good! But it was not. I think, objectively speaking, even if my dad was not my dad, I would have thought him the best and funniest character in the whole thing. (And you can watch him talk ’bout it here, after Anna Friel around 1:30.)

Away We Go This movie may have ruined John Krasinski for me.

BrΓΌno This movie was worse than a movie that may have ruined John Krasinski for me. I enjoyed Borat; I felt sick afterward, but I had laughed and couldn’t believe some of things people did and said. This one? Lame, dumb, obvious, and juvenile. Really and truly stupid. I kept trying to think how this was somehow excellent social commentary, that there was some clever point he was making by simulating sex over and over and over again. But guess what? Nope. It’s just the same “shocking” joke again and again. Which, frankly, is not shocking at all. This film gets a chorus of boooooos from me.

And for the rest of the summer: Star Trek (I still haven’t seen it…eep), The Ugly Truth (I know, I don’t want to see it, but I know I will), Fifty Dead Men Walking, Adam, Julie & Julia (!), Bandslam, District 9, Time Traveler’s Wife…

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6 thoughts on “(500) Movies of Summer

  1. Wait now, the print that I saw of HP was really fuzzy in spots too and I also thought it was an artistic choice, until the credits started to roll and they were totally out of focus! So I complained and got some free passes. Did you notice the credits?
    Jealous about "The Proposal" and "500 Days of Summer." Both are on my list.
    Also, if you need a date for "The Ugly Truth," I'm your girl. I have the ability to both appreciate the romcom-ness of a movie and mock it mercilessly at the same time.

  2. hmmm. did not watch the credits. i wonder if it was the print, and not intentional… It wasn't consistently out of focus in the same areas…

    Let's so-oh-oh go see The Ugly Truth together! yes.

  3. The Ugly Truth – save yourself. I would do anything for Gerard Butler, but I cannot suffer through Izzie anymore. SHE BUGS.

    And I prefer my Gerard Scottish and indecipherable.

  4. Too late! We saw it. And Izzie was less annoying than expected. But the movie was still absolute crrrrap! (pronounced a la Scot)

  5. did i ever tell you that 500 days of summer was written by my lse classmate about my former flatmate? true story. she doesn't deserve to be played by zooey.
    xx

  6. you did, you did! i remember the ire. completely different as portrayed by Zooey. utterly and completely.

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