OMGWTFGG: "Pret-a-Poor-J"

Dare I say it? Season two of Gossip Girl is just as good, if not BETTER, than season one.

Enter Aaron Rose. Aaron Rose! Super job with the casting. He’s way hotter than the Gossip Girl books’ Aaron Rose (way hotter than he was in my mind, i mean) but he still has that alt-vegan-art vibe happening. In the books, Eleanor Waldorf marries Aaron’s father Cyrus. Aaron and Serena date, but so do Aaron and Vanessa. And he has a dog named Mookie! Attention to detail appreciated, GG writers. I didn’t read those Cecily von Ziegesar books for nuthin!

Right from the opening, this episode is glorious. I always love breakfast at the Humphrey loft and a Nate/Jenny run-in at the bathroom makes it so much better. Make-over week on Gossip Girl totally worked for Little J. Her dress is insanely perfect, as is her hair. “Shorter, blonder, I got bored.” Ya, right. You casually invented a coherently awesome grown-up look for yourself.

Let’s relive the Glorious Glory that was “Pret-a-Poor-J.”

  • Blair to Serena, re: Dan: “You hear the judgment in his voice?” Yes. Yes, we do.
  • Dan’s excellent plan for B to win Chuck: “Drive him crazy and wear him down. You should be good at that.”
  • Chuck to Blair, on her new perfume: “Smells a little like desperation” and then he leaves, “I’m bored. You ruined my pants.”
  • Blair to Dan: “I can skip dinner because I am so full of humiliation.” Zong. I hate that full of humiliation feeling.
  • More Chuck puns! with B’s Chuck was out of there “like a Bass out of hell.”
  • Points to Gossip Girl: “You can’t take a note to the principal when a drunken model eats your homework.”
  • Serena retort to Blair’s jump-off-the-gallery-roof comment: “Oh B, don’t do that. You don’t want your obit to say you died in Brooklyn.”
  • The secondary embarrassment factor going THROUGH THE ROOF times a million when Nate walks in on J’s bra dance party. This is what teen dramas are for: the awkward.
  • Um, the last scene?? Holy shiz, as much as it’s weird to watch 15-year-old Taylor Momsen make out with 23-year-old Chace Crawford, I was so jazzed to see Nate and Jenny having a kissy good time! Remember last year when they totally connected on the night of B’s birthday and talked all night? Remember when he kissed her, but thought she was Serena? Remember when she walked in on him and he was all in his towel? They are a way better couple than Nate and Vanessa.
Speaking of…

Poor, poor Vanessa. The writers are giving her NOTHING to work with. She is just crusty and misinformed all the time. And giving Dan shit for “inviting” Blair to her opening? She says, “my opening.” Not your opening. It’s Aaron’s, maybe Rufus’s. Boooooooo. She could be such a good character and she’s just being wasted. I think it’s time for Dan and Vanessa to get together and be awesome for a while. Eat perogies at Veselka. See 400 Blows at the Sunshine. Do those things that we can’t see Chuck and Blair do.

While I’m complaining, Serena’s outfit she wore to the gallery (in the day): it was barf-party-boringtown. I would wear that. I don’t want to see any outfits on any Gossip Girl characters that I could put together from my own closest, K? Luckily she picks it up with the gallery opening outfit. It’s a bit boobcentric but I love the leather jacket and the color of her dress. Behold and judge the two gallery outfits:

Chuck and Blair at the movies. Chuck and Blair holding hands. Chuck is right: Chair or Bluck or whatever you wanna call ’em wouldn’t work as a happy couple. Even Pam and Jim have to have tension, and Chuck and Blair would be totally weird. But still… Heartbreak City.

And B’s one tear? Leighton Meester is a goddamn genius. Blair is a hard character to play exactly right and she hits every moment.

What will happen with Chuck and Blair now?? Endless game playing? Maybe a bit of a break from the incessant back and forth and some other plot lines for these kids? Sigh. Will Blair ever get to be happy? Has she been happy for one full episode?

And will Little J actually start her own clothing line? I would totally buy her clothes. You know, if she wasn’t a fictional character.

Zong. I love this show and maybe have lost my mind a bit? GG ftw.

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5 thoughts on “OMGWTFGG: "Pret-a-Poor-J"

  1. I’m finding this season strange, because I’m generally not enjoying my favourite characters from last season and finding new appreciation for the characters I didn’t care for.Oh, and I’m not sure boobcentric is a strong enough word for the gallery outfit. Those puppies were seriously hoisted and then displayed on a platter!

  2. Enjoyed it! Enjoy your recaps even more! By the way, is anyone else getting tired of Blake Lively’s Serena? The way she always pouts and her mouth turns down and she gets that broken whiny voice, whether she’s being thoughtful, angry, upset, or comforting? I love her when she smiles, hate it when she’s all serious.

  3. Tammy: who did you like last season that you’re not feeling this year? Would “boobtastic” be more appropriate? “boobsplosion”?ChapatiKid: I liked Serena a lot this episode (thought she was super charming) but I know what you mean about her face and her voice. can get annoying but mostly: love her.

  4. I’m feeling “boobsplosion,” because they did look like they were ready to burst forth into the world and get their own show.I’m totally bored by Dan, even though I usually like the smart boys with tidy haircuts. And Serena is making me yawn, too. But suddenly Nate, who I could have done without last year, is getting stuff to do!

  5. Nate is my new high school boy crush. Dan is cute, but he has Chiclet teeth (kind of like Joe Biden). And Chuck would be the guy I’d cheat on Nate with. Oh if I were five years younger. Sigh.

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